Just...an admirer

 Just...an admirer

The unmistakable expressive eyes of a dancer, the long, thick black hair starting at the big forehead with a long bindi at the centre, the evening lamps of the temple playing magic with her golden earrings  and nose pin, I almost skipped a beat and jumped the clutch of my car. I regained composure and somehow parked my car while a deluge of memories flooded my mind. The last time she called me, there was an uncanny tinge of pride and revenge in her voice. I still remember her exact words" the first person who came to see me, liked me and I am getting married to him" and I did wish her all the happiness. But  was she really happy? Was I an immature idiot (According to her at that time) or was my gut feeling about things to happen (Even at the threat of suicide from her) true? I had no  way of figuring  out what was happening in her life after the bitter breakup five years back other than through insincere facebook updates and pics which generally shows artificially happy faces and insanely hep backgrounds  for even the terminally depressed. I felt like an eager child waiting for results after the exams. Yes I needed to know whether my predictions for her  came true or not. Almost in a trance, I got out of the car and walked towards the peepul tree under which I saw her. Reaching around the corner, there she was turning to fan the crowd with her piercing gaze when she suddenly spotted me, her eyes widened even more, there was a moments hesitation whether to ignore and carry on, I could see her  struggling with her emotions and I felt kind off an instant bonding coz I too went through the same  emotional overdose a while back, I gave a comforting smile and waved to her . She was still shocked when I asked her how she was. I felt it was an insanely huge amount of time when she kept eye contact, thought  and smiled to reply " yes am fine " then she blushed and blushed how, like the times she used to when she was with me. There is a limit to what you can hide from others, some are just too obvious for people who have known each other close enough and long enough to ignore.   Fleeting a last glimpse at her, I cant help but notice the glow in her face, yes she was beautiful and happy. My prediction has cometh true, she is happy in her new world but I felt more elated  for  yes. No wonder I had almost fallen for this  woman, she is beautiful .The beauty of a woman is in making a man feel like one- as a father, son, lover or even just an ardent admirer.

A Blessing

A Blessing

She is lying on my hand. Eyes closed, her sprightly hair slightly teasing my chest, a slight smile spread across her lips like a dreaming baby. A satisfaction that only a woman can express with closed eyes. I know that satisfaction is derived from the fact that she knows that I am admiring her. There are times when you dream with your eyes open and rarer still when you are completely aware with your eyes closed, Feeling and breathing in the warmth of the moment and let heartbeats do the talking. My ego doesn’t allow me to let her know that I envy her satisfaction, but in a trance, I touch her forehead and let my finger rundown through her nose on to her lips. A wave of happiness passes through her body, she swallows a big smile and still eyes tightly shut, turns towards me and hugs me completely and rests her head  on my chest. I part the hair on her forehead and give a small peck and she keeps one leg over me. At peace, completely relaxed, I know for sure a little love and affection is what all beings crave for  and being the source of it a blessing

Gates of Dawn

Gates of Dawn

I feel a shiver through my body.I dig my feet to get some warmth and there is sand. Yes sand between my feet. I clutch my hands and again sand and slight wetness all around the hard surface. My eyes are sour and it pains when I try to open it. I suddenly feel a dryness. My lips,  mouth and all through to my stomach, it feels like ages since I have had some Water. Water, Yes I can hear water and lots of it too .Am I at a beach ?

I try rubbing my eyes, but my hands are stiff. My whole body is stiff from the cold and dampness. I strain and try to open my eyes, against the stickiness of my eyelashes, the first rays feel like slight pin pricks. I shield my eyes with my hand and strain to see the stars straining too, to hold on to their brilliance of last night against the coming dawn. There is a white strike across the sky like a kids first attempt at a bulls eye. The sky is still  black but right at the centre has a  golden hue, trailing off to red, violet and its myriad variants on to the blackness beyond. The birds are coming to and the beach dog is taking a lazy stroll ;even its tail is stiff. Far across, I can see local folks getting ready for their morning voyage across the sea, mangy, noisy but full of life. I compare it to my own daily drag across to my office ; Decked in crisp formal attire, AC on full blow in the car, fresh on the  outside  but  dead inside. But this brings a smile to my face as I realise I don’t have to continue that ritual from today, Yes I have been fired from office and am damn happy about it. Maybe it’s the beauty of the dawn, nothing can keep me from being happy today. I have woken up without an alarm after a long time and doesn’t have to strain my mind to decide what to do next. In the distance I see her walking to me with two cups of tea and my smile reaches a full crescent .Yes , the gates of dawn has opened and the day lays across getting brighter by the moment